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From:	Savannah (sba8.sba.nau.edu)
Subject:	Re: Convincing skeptical husbands to try the diet
Date:	April 20, 2006 at 7:18 am PST

In Reply to: Convincing skeptical husbands to try the diet posted by Molly on April 19, 2006 at 12:03 pm:

Hi Molly,

My experience is that it took 2 years of following a plant-based diet for my partner to start coming around. At first, being so excited, I probably did "campaign" a bit. But then I got wise and pretty much quit.

Seeing & comparing differences helped: I lost ~100 pounds, she was still very heavy. My cholesterol 152, hers 195. Her HDL (which everyone seem more concerned about than the overall, strangely enough) was 47, mine 57. Her BP has been creeping up to 120/85, mine 117/68. Her energy level was incredibly low, while mine began to skyrocket -- I'd get up at 4:30, exercise for an hour, go to work all day, come home and walk the dogs and cut firewood. She could barely make it through the day.

What also helped was when her health issues would start to come up (her blood sugar was alarmingly high....I forgot what it was), and I would just quietly say something like, "Well, diet and exercise can help a lot with that" and let it go. I quit giving undue sympathy for things she was bringing on herself -- high BP, high blood sugar, back pain. And I brought up (NOT in a heated moment) how it might be selfish for a spouse/partner to eat in such a way that causes early ill health so that the healthy partner is forced to deal with, and be burdened by, the other's bad choices! I also bought her the Dr. McDougall DVD set (McD is vegan but starch based) which really impressed her.

She now eats meat only 2x per week, although she still has to have a little dessert after lunch and dinner (she's from the mid-west and that's just how it is). She's even gone from drinking 2 gallons of milk a week to rice milk which, believe you me, is nothing short of a miracle.

So, people can change, but it can be a long, slow process. The things I listed worked for me, for her, and how our personalities fit (someone else may not be able to mention diet and exercise in response to a health issue without getting blasted!;) so each E2L-er's approach has to be tailored to their spouse/partner...

Best of luck,
Savannah

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