I met Justin at an overnight lock-in
sponsored by the honors program. We were freshmen and
didn't know anyone, so although he was a bit annoying,
we talked a few hours that night. They served brownies
and pizza. Justin inquired why I wasn't eating anything.
When I explained that I was vegan, he gave me one of
the responses that vegans dread hearing (probably because
we hear it so often), "But weren't animals put on the
earth to be eaten by humans?" Amazingly, a month later
we were dating.
At the time, I wouldn't explain why
I was a vegan. It was too important to me, and I did
not want to compromise my belief or my relationship
by trying to mix them. Still, Justin had questions and
did research on veg*nism. A few weeks after dating me,
Justin became a vegetarian. While this made me happy,
it also added stress. I want my loved ones to be veg*n,
but I always wondered if he was doing it just to make
me happy, or how long it would last, or how I would
deal with the disappointment I would feel if he returned
to his meat-eating ways.
I did not have to deal with those questions
the first year. We dated for about six months, then
went separate ways over the summer. At home, he again
became a meat-eater. Our sophomore year we were tentative
friends, but towards the end of the year we again became
fond of each other and started dating.
Sometimes I would ramble on about how
great being a vegan is. Still, I knew I couldn't ask
him about his transformations from omni to herbi to
omni because it would cause a rift between us. It does
bother me that he eats meat. I must console myself by
saying that maybe it isn't his time yet, and take hope
from the vegetarian vegetable soup on his shelf and
his mentioning that he doesn't eat veal. He may not
have cared about veg*nism, but he did care about me.
He would eat my food when he was over and order a cheeseless
pizza for me without making a face.
Due to distance, I am now single. It's
hard to find someone who will care about a passionate
zealot. I would like the person I date to be a vegan.
But I think it's more important to find someone who
will care about me than someone who will care about
the same things.
by Carrie C.
e x t e s s a y -
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