I have found it near impossible to find a male partner
who shares my views. I live in a conservative area and
I think that the guys around here really believe that
they will become infertile if they become a vegetarian
or go all the way to veganism. I am surrounded by people
who claim to be vegan or vegetarians while eating chicken.
During my teenage years the only accessible boys in
my peer group where "hessians." We were the bad kids,
dressed in all black. We were always banging our heads
to the reverberations of Ozzy, which never quite left
our heads since we were practically deaf from the volume
at which it was cool to listen. I judged prospective
boyfriends by the length of their hair and their love
for my favorite bands. I was a goner if the boy liked
When I was eighteen, I met a boy my age (I was a vegetarian
at that time) who told me that he too was a vegetarian.
I thought this was a new pickup line, and before I could
stop myself I blurted out, "That's like an oxymoron
right? I mean you are a guy." Although this relationship
ended horribly, it changed my views about dating. He
did not know who Megadeth was but Oscar Wilde was his
favorite author. He understood the cathartic aspects
of painting and creating beauty everywhere we went.
I learned that compassion can be universal.
I have since become far more knowledgeable but no less
disenchanted about the lack of male vegans in my area.
I have met very few. I can count them on one hand, and
I do not even have the dominant polydactyl gene.
In all fairness, the few male veg*ns have been for
the most part wonderful yet typical of the human species.
When I look inside, I realize that my compassion is
limited to nonhuman animals and I should not have expected
more from others.
Onward to the present and my current relationship.
He is not a veg*n. For the past two years there has
never (to my knowledge) been meat in our house. Enter
Dr. Atkins. Now I have to do my grocery shopping separately
from my chosen one. I am surrounded by death in our
kitchen. I can't eat when he does. And I promise that
if he touches my veg*n hot dogs I'll rap his knuckles
with my fork.
Dating is such a delicate situation. I am rather ethnocentric
when it comes to my views, beliefs, and values. I feel
that I live with the equivalent of a veg*n heathen.
I hope that one day he will see the "light." Until then
I will tempt him with soymilk smoothies and other vegan
- n e x t e
s s a y -
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