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Exercise
People who exercise for the sake of exercising have
always struck me as being insane. I know several of
them, and they are truly lovely individuals, but that
doesn't mean that they aren't crazy. I myself have the
lizard-like ability to sit motionless for hours. I also
like junk food and coffee and cigarettes and all kinds
of other unhealthy things. The cigarettes are on their
way out, and not accidentally because they are only
marginally vegan at best, but when the day comes that
I can't sit around for hours drinking coffee and reading,
I don't know what I'll do. Omnivores, and even some
other vegans hear this, and they are shocked. Because
I'm vegan, they expect me to be eating bean sprouts
and flexing my muscles. Constantly. I like bean sprouts,
and I've been known to flex a muscle or two. The thing
is, I'm not doing this for my health. I became vegan
because the suffering and cruelty of the animal industries
is unconscionable, not because all that excess dairy
was totally slowing down my sprinting speed.
Granted, there are far worse stereotypes than "Group
X is attractive, healthy, and physically fit," but if
I want to be a lump on the couch drinking coconut milk
straight out of the can while I watch Animal Planet,
then so friggin' be it! In the past, people have tried
to shame me because of this attitude. "Go fly a kite.
I'm as vegan as anyone," I told them. Well, I wish.
In actual fact, I kind of hung my head and nodded. It's
difficult to pull off that maneuver under the best of
conditions, and when people put you down because you're
not what you're supposed to be, it's worse. Now, though,
I say screw 'em. If I want to take a jog around the
block or practice some Aikido rolls, awesome. Otherwise,
pass the coconut milk. This vegan ain't moving 'til
she's ready.
Cara K.
Virginia
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