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From: Rishia (71.171.23.204)
Subject:         Re: Unusual situation; trying to help my 16-year-old homeschooled friend whose parents completely neglect her education
Date: December 2, 2013 at 5:02 pm PST

In Reply to: Unusual situation; trying to help my 16-year-old homeschooled friend whose parents completely neglect her education posted by Kristin on September 26, 2012 at 1:10 am:

Dear One,
You have nothing but admirable intentions, yet
from what you did state regarding her OVERALL
situation, there really is only one 'right action' to
take. Call Social Services in locality she lives in,
not 'works' in if she is out and about traveling a
bit.
WHY? Because this is clear child negligence, and
perhaps even more. Your friend is, until the age
18, or is declared by the court 'independent' with
a 'guardian ad litem ', ....A MINOR CHILD AT GRAVE
RISK .
I was forced by my mother to model from age 2
until she died in a traffic accident when I had just
turned 16. The reason this post, albeit old, strikes
home to me. No money was saved for my future
upper division education, or for any other
purpose. YET I did attend school and obtained a
decent education, and upon graduation at 17, left
home and did well enough for myself.
I don't think your friend would fare well at all upon
turning 18, and becoming a legal adult. Don't you
remember being 16,17,18,19,20! Now compare
that younger you with your friend. THINK on this.
She knows nothing about the real cruel world out
there, just ready to pounce on a vulnerable,
beautiful, naive (to real life) un-sophisticated,
young woman.
She actually may know more than you think she
does about the CRUEL part. I doubt you have a
real picture, understanding of the LIFE she is
living. The type of bloodsuckers she is surrounded
by daily. NO real friends. She has, at the least,
been sexually harassed on the 'job'. Perhaps, and
I imagine she has, perhaps even been pressured
into having sex with older men who hold her
future in their hands, which is how they would get
her compliance. Don't even ask her, let
professionally trained individuals discern the
gravity of her circumstances. and where her
parents lie within the entire scope of things
regarding culpability.
Her, at the very least selfish, parasitic, very
stupid, most likely uneducated PARENTS are not
living in the real world either. They are in a big
fantasy with the Princess providing them with a
nice cushy retirement plan. I doubt that is the
extent of it.
I suspect her greedy parents are ill-equipped
intellectually to navigate legal contracts being s
signed by your young friend.
Most likely a cheap, crooked AGENT is helping to
assure they are ALL taken advantage of. Her
parents have to account to the school district for
your friends 'academic progress' annually, by one
of several means. If they are homeschooling her
under the 'religious' exmption, they don't. YET
they can't use this aspect of the law unless their
religious beliefs are considered bonafide. Which
obviously they aren't. REPORT PARENTS TO THE
OFFICE OF THE SUPERINTENDENT OF HER
SCHOOL DISTRICT. Legally you don't have to,
ethically you should, in writing.
I imagine if your friend makes any money, her
parents spend it. She needs a 'guardian ad litum',
someone appointed by the court to assure she is
legally protected, many issues there, and assures
that: her earnings are protected, her 'living
conditions' are suitable, she receives proper
health care, adequate nutrition AND a high school
education.
This young girl needs HELP on many levels, from
individuals that are only concerned about HER
welfare. The ball starts rolling when someone
cares enough to call and report the parents to
Social Services.
If you truly do care, you must be willing to do what
is RIGHT. What is right, almost invariably is NOT
popular NOR easy. I imagine you have hesitated
because your friend has asked you not to, or you
are afraid she will be mad at you and you will
loose her friendship.
YOU are an adult, need to look at your
responsibility to your friend legally as well as
ethically.
You can make a written detailed report,
anonymously or call and do the same,
anonymously. I recommend, for your friends sake,
that you do so openly, not anonymously.
Legally, this very minute you are BOUND BY LAW
TO REPORT THEM, as you are AWARE OF
INCRIMINATING FACTS, not assumptions.
Yet even if you were UNSURE about her
circumstances, you know enough to be bound by
law to report WHAT YOU KNOW, WHAT HAS BEEN
TOLD TO YOU BY A MINOR CHILD.... to the proper
authorities. YES, you are LIABLE legally. Little
known fact that is true in more states than not.
For good reason. Another more dramatic example
is if you: come upon a car wreck, parts and peices
everywhere and obviously injured persons. You
stop, take a look, and drive on, doing nothing else.
GUILTY "failure to report...caused ultimate harm
to...". get the legal picture?
Her life will be better for it, since HOPEFULLY no
physical abuse . That is if she likes the work she is
doing, if NOT = forced child labor, and therefore
parents are criminally liable.
Social Svcs would not recommend removing her
from the home without just cause. Unless she
wants OUT for any reason.
Please do follow through for your 'friend'. I read
advice you were given and do not agree that you
should take any responsibility for assuring she
gets an education. As in providing, if you had the
money, 5k for a good online program that can deal
with her educational deficits. You would be doing
her NO favor there. It is NOT easy, takes time, to
determine the degree of her educational deficits,
as well as her style of learning. She can't educate
herself, or she already would be.
Your friend needs help with her LIFE, not just her
lack of a satisfactory education, significant
enough in itself, but there are bigger concerns as
well.. CIRCUMSTANCES NOW, AND IN HER NEAR
FUTURE.
Make the call, follow through, keep after social
services, they are slow to respond to overt
neglect and abuse! So be that for her now, her
advocate, someone who cares and damn the
torpedoes you are going to keep after all involved
until it is no longer an issue and things have
changed for the better for your friend.
Trust me, they are starving her too. How much
does she weigh? Too thin? Assuredly she is too
thin, may be anemic, may have numerous health
issues as I doubt she eats well or gets enough
sleep. I imagine she couldn't pass a drug test. If
she's not doping herself, someone surely IS.
I also know what type of people are hovering
around in her 'work'. Life suckers, pedophiles,
generally people that only care abut her as a
COMMODITY. She most likely looks much older
than she is, and many will consider her to be an
apple to be plucked, then discarded.
She is being taken advantage of by the majority of
the people that are in her life.
You must take the 'right action', or it will forever
haunt you when she ends up dead by 25, your age.
As you could have made a difference in her life,
perhaps even saving her life. Irregardless, you
should feel guilty if you, as an adult friend of a
minor, do NOT call Social Services.
I am always this blunt when faced with a question
such as yours, there is no room for niceties.
Sincerely, someone who cares, about YOU and
your friend


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