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From: Mettenna (
Subject:         Wasn't he released on TECHNICALITY - not because he's a "model" of anything?
Date: October 2, 2006 at 9:00 am PST

In Reply to: The comments you have made here in regards to him... posted by homeschoolin on September 28, 2006 at 12:22 pm:

I have great regard and empathy for the pain and heartache that Brenda is feeling. The emotions that she is experiencing under the circumstances are really easy to comprehend, Christian or not. I find the divorce process and life afterward much like the stages of grief associated with losing a loved one to death. Going through the anger stage is normal, human, and yes, not always entirely Christian. We're all imperfect, Christian or not. No one ever takes aside an individual in the stage of anger after losing a loved one and beats them up over the head for it, over and over. Let's lift Brenda up and support her as she works through this difficult situation - not the same as supporting any attitude or emotion with which we may dissagree. I'd rather have her reflect on positive suggestions and soothing prayers and intentions for her (Christian) growth than wasting her time answering personal attacks.

Fear is such a strong emotion. I personally think Brenda is gripped with a fear for the children that she loves and has STRUGGLED to support and nurture ALONE - completely natural. It's tough to see the positive influence a formerly convicted and incarcerated drug-manufacturing/distributing, cheating husband might have in the lives of the children he forsook and neglected - completely normal to struggle with that. I for one would have similar fears, and have struggled with some of the same emotions in my own situation, with a mostly upstanding (by the world's standards) former-husband. The more we ask Brenda to defend these feelings, the more support for her fear she will develop as she thinks over and over of the reasons for feeling that way and she stays firmly entrenched in those feelings. I'd like to see Brenda grow in the grace of the Lord through this situation and choose the right thing to do one step at a time as the Lord leads her. She is where she is, and we don't get to pick where she starts out. We can either keep her from growing or help her to grow and move on.

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