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From: Maureen (
Subject:         Re: Need help with daughter in college
Date: October 14, 2009 at 11:07 am PST

In Reply to: Need help with daughter in college posted by Sue on October 10, 2009 at 4:00 pm:

No sense talking to her about him, she'll just feel she has to defend him.

Instead, try talking to her about how she envisions her life 5, 10 years from now. Does she want kids? then she will need to be able to support them. Most marriages today have about an 8-year life expectancy. It takes two to make a marriage but only one to walk out. That's just the way life is. If she marries a military guy, she's got to be willing to face the very high likelihood of being widowed early. Even if the marriage lasts, it pretty much takes two incomes just to get by these days. And a woman has to provide for her own old age; husband pensions are a thing of the past now and that will be more true in the next 20 years or so. So, if she is less than thrilled about college, what's her plan for making enough money to pay for a house, get a job with insurance, support kids?This way, you're not attacking the boyfriend, just asking her to think realistically about life after her schooling. That might make schooling look more attractive.

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