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From: Maureen (
Subject:         things to consider
Date: October 13, 2009 at 7:23 am PST

In Reply to: full time job. 8th grader who wants out of school posted by jos on October 12, 2009 at 10:37 am:

Can you support yourself and your children if you quit your job and work an at-home job? can you telecommute? will you lose your health insurance and retirement if you do?

Some people leave their kids on their own during the day and expect them to educate themselves out of workbooks. Personally, I don't think this is a good idea. Unless your child is intellectually brilliant, incredibly mature and self-motivated, and utterly reliable - and not likely to get lonely stuck alone in the house day after day - I think you could count on trouble. It would be hard for a kid who is not thrilled with academics in the first place to teach herself completely. Best case scenario is she slacks off on schoolwork and watches soaps or texts all day. Worst case is, you're a grandma next year.

IF you have some way to take part in a homeschool coop so that she is with people during the day, and you might be able to contribute your part on evenings or weekends, or as a tutor, that might work.

Why does she hate school? is it the other kids? one particular subject???

You might try telling her that middle school is horrible, you understand (and it is), but high school is not so bad, and college is really great so if she can keep it together and fix her mind on getting to college, this too shall pass. IF there is something about school can can be changed, or worked with, it's worth trying. She might benefit from a couple sessions with a counselor to set some goals for herself, or talk about whatever social issues she might be dealing with.

Ultimately, as long as you have to make a living, she might have to grit her teeth and bear it for now. High school really IS better!

Try taking her to work with you. Perhaps she can spend a day at work with each of a series of friends or relatives, do a project on career selection and career preparation. It helps make it clearer that even when school is a drag, there is a future to prepare for and make choices about.

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