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From: shoeycat (c-67-185-242-167.hsd1.wa.comcast.net)
Subject:         Re: I regret homeschooling my son
Date: November 6, 2007 at 8:12 pm PST

In Reply to: I regret homeschooling my son posted by Karen on November 3, 2007 at 9:24 pm:

Karen,
I don't think I have ever even looked at the message boards here before tonight, but I happened to this evening and saw your post. I want to encourage you not to accept this heavy load of guilt. Our oldest (homeschooled all the way through)made some poor choices in his teen years, and it took me a couple of years to sort out where my responsibility ended and his began. I was very depressed for a long time over his behavior, feeling that it must be my fault, but finally realized that each person gets to make his own choices. He could just as easily be lambasting you for NOT homeschooling him, telling you that public school destroyed his life. At that point you'd be feeling tremendous guilt for NOT homeschooling. You made the very best decisions you could at that time, with love for him and a desire for the best for him. Stand firm, now, loving him and praying for him, but not accepting his blame and accusations. Life has a way of teaching our older children things they will not hear from us. No parent can make perfect decisions all the time, but God's grace meets us where we are if we entrust our lives to Him. If I had listened to our daughter in her mid-teens, I would have given up for sure, but now (at twenty) she thanks us for giving her a good foundation.
Confess your failures and fears to God, and let Him comfort your heart. It is hard to have just one child, as you have no others by which to judge your parenting, but as the mom of six I can tell you that the same family can produce very different results, depending upon how the child chooses to respond! May God grant you peace and rest as you struggle through this difficult time.
You are not alone!
Shelley Boyd


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